Post Europe

I must say - Leaving your home for 4 months to explore is a life-changing experience (which is a complete understatement). I haven't posted since I returned... There was a part of me that wanted everything to be just so upon my return. I had plans in my mind of how life would be - I would pick work back up right where I left off... Find a place to live quickly in San Francisco and be on my merry way. Eventually all of those plans happened, but they happened in a time line that took much longer than I expected.

During this period after arriving back to the united states I went through many transformations and necessary submission to the wacky ways of the universe. Spent time living with my parents, even my grandmother - the more I would try to control the circumstances in my life, the more resistance I would face. Eventually I just had to give up...allowing the universe to give me whatever it wanted. I found a place to live in San Francisco finally with wonderful roomates in a perfect location, and shortly after I found work - teaching at an Art University in Sacramento.

I drive between the 2 cities, living a weekend life in San Francisco and a working life in Sacramento where I can share my creative inspiration with my students. I have found it to be one of the most rewarding experiences imaginable. To learn information with the intention of teaching it to another is a powerful process. I believe I have increased my knowledge of my industry by at least 40% since I started teaching.

It has been 7 months since my return from Europe and I would say that I have finally adjusted. I am so grateful for having gone on that trip - I feel like it was fundamental in my process as a human and necessary for me to learn to depend solely on myself...not to mention some great photos and paintings. I believe my true essense started to leak out into my paintings during my trip and I found a way to truly let go and not think when I am creating.

New Paintings

My Mornings

It is autumn now, and the leaves have turned a hot orange. I wake up in the mornings around 6:30, the conditions are perfect: a fog lovingly lays itself upon the city and I walk with the sun, up many steps to the Marienburg fortress. Everything is mysterious and thought-provoking in the fog. Some of my best moments are during this time. Slowly German words are coming to me.....Slowly, a good amount is understood, but I can barely speak a word - however people tell me that my accent is excellent. Here are a few pictures of my mornings...I'll be posting my paintings in a short while. I have never felt so creative in my life.

Decided to stay

I have decided to stay here in Wurzburg Germany for one more month. After making the decision, I felt incredibly relieved that I had done something which my heart wanted. I feel deliciously good and relaxed here, and although I still have yet to find a place to stay, I trust that I will find exactly what I need. I'm at a hostel now, last night I was kept awake by a couple who was having sex in the bunk above me. I thought it was pretty silly how they thought no one could hear them. That's hostels for you. But anyways - I've started working again from my computer - so if you know of anyone who needs a freelance graphic designer - send them my way :)

The city divided amongst itself.

Berlin - Very cool scene. This is the most "Artistic" city that I have seen thus far. The grafiti on the walls is actually beautiful and there are countless galleries and impeccable graphic design spread across the city. I had the chance to meet a couple from Vienna - the husband was the graphic designer for the "art Forum Berlin" which they gave me VIP passes to. It was a collection of fine artists in one building who set up their installations. There must have been at least 300 artists, of which about 100 were extremely inspiring. I have been staying in a lovely hostel next to a forest with a lake, and when I come home from being in the city - it is like medicine to take my bike into the woods and become myself again. There's something about Berlin that weighs to heavy on my head. I can only spend a few hours in the city before I become very tired in my body. I feel so heavy and I just have to be around some nature. -The moment I walk into the forest, I feel like I have breathed my first breath.
A walking tour of Berlin is absolutely a must if you ever visit. This is one of the most historically rich places I have ever seen. I saw Humbolt University where Albert Einstein taught, as well as old Nazi buildings, A Jewish Halocaust memorial and of course - the Berlin Wall. I was surprised when I saw how short the wall was - Its short enough that you believe you can climb it...but just high enough that it would be extremely difficult. There used to be 2 walls succeeding eachother, and the space in between the walls had the alias of "The Death Strip." It was filled with Raked sand so the guards could see if someone crossed, and the watch towers looked right upon the strip, the guards were promoted if they shot anyone crossing the border. I cannot believe such terrible history existed during my lifetime.
Berlin commemorates its victims in a very grand way. There are many memorials placed around the city which evoke thought and curiosity. The Victimizers are left to the dust and barely receives any recognition at all. Hitler's bunker is not labeled, and it is next to a parkinglot of an apartment complex where the apartment tenants take their dogs to relieve themselves in the morning.

West Berlin

September 25^th

I arrived in Berlin and at first I felt extremely uncomfortable, and the people were very cold and rigid – which is exactly what I expected of a place torn in half by a wall. It was very difficult for me to find my way around, and I decided just to take my time and eat something. I finally found my hostel – which is very far away from the city center, which I am actually very thankful for. The closer I got to the hostel, the better I felt because it lies on the skirt of an incredible forest. It is completely green around me with small trails and the air is moist with a lot of oxygen. The hostel owner is kind, and his son is a ball of energy – he is so cute.

I took a bike and rode over to a piece of historic farmland – which has an organic garden, animals, and little shops of craftsmen – there is a batik print house and a pottery house – all incredible things. I feel very, very special here, and I could see myself staying here at this hostel for quite some time.

Jessica Day

September 25^th

Peter has notified me that today is “Jessica Day.” I was not aware of this holiday, but I am very lucky that I happened to be in Würzburg on this day. The first thing we did on Jessica day was visit the fresh fruit shop and I had a delicious yogurt with berries.
We walked up many steps to the top of a hill, which was the resting place for a beautiful castle overlooking the entire town. There are so many places to explore and it feels more like a small town than a building.
Do you know what a Smart Car is? Its made by Mercedes and its only big enough to hold 2 people and 1 suitcase – that’s about how big the car is. In a pinch, you could park in horizontally in a vertical parking space – which means that you can park it ANYWHERE! It gets incredible gas mileage and they are quite popular here in Europe. Soon they will come to America and I recommend that you test drive one, because it feels exactly like a regular car, but its so small. The dealership let us have one for a couple hours and we went around, exploring in the smart car. Peter showed me the tiny village where he grew up and the buildings and streets were so lovely. When I describe Germany, one of the only words I can think to use is the word “lovely.”

We’ve been talking about the idea of me staying in Germany for another month, and I must say that I am seriously thinking about it. With my heart I feel so good here, and I know that I would be opening myself up to a world of new possibilities. Although in my head, I know that I might be giving up some good business opportunities in the United States – unless I am talented with my telecommuting skills. I could take an apartment for one month, Start freelancing from here. An amazing day really and I am left feeling very stirred up inside like a small piece of metal is ricocheting off my insides. I need help finding a place to stay for a month – with internet and a comfortable place to sit. I will go to Berlin for a couple days to think about things.